[原创] that is life

coldfeeter · 发表于 2006-9-20 15:44

My life sucks. so what i put down is not so meaningful. It is all bout bunches of trivial records of what i did or what i am doing or maybe what i wil do.

hilary · 发表于 2006-9-23 15:53

French is said to be a beautiful language.i guess it will be worth the time and energy.

marc · 发表于 2006-9-23 16:00

It is a beautiful language but a bit more difficult for some learners then english because it has so many verbs and objects are either masculine or femanine.

marc · 发表于 2006-9-22 13:07

If you decide to learn french.  Jennifer (aka Caroline) and I can both speak some.  Actually when I chat with her on MSN she only writes in French.The only Italians I have heard about in Tian Tai work at some pharmaceutical company.  I was just told that because they are the other foreigners in Tian Tai.  ha ha haMarc

marc · 发表于 2006-9-25 19:15

Well you did manage to get 4 posts in this thread today.  I would say that is alot.  I sure you will find some time to write a lot more.I hope you don't get too stressed out during your meeting and find time to enjoy the weather very soon before it gets to cold.

coldfeeter · 发表于 2006-9-25 18:04

I meant to stay here and would not eat until the meeting was over but i luckily had a friend for company going for dinner. We had some yummy  vermicelli made of rice with some dried day lily flowers, skin of soy bean milk, and dried bean curd, pickles and a little bit shredded meat :)

coldfeeter · 发表于 2006-9-25 18:06

I would like to say something today but i have to attend a meeting in a few minutes. me somewhat like a busy bee :)

coldfeeter · 发表于 2006-9-25 16:17

haven't been here for a few days. surpringly i could meet marc here. welcome, marc, and thank you i will think about your suggestions.

coldfeeter · 发表于 2006-9-25 16:28

Such a beautiful day.  I am always busy with the work, so I am obliged to write down something when I have time coming here. I might gab away for the rest afternoon.

marc · 发表于 2006-9-26 13:11

Whoops Jennifer (aka Caroline)  I think you posted on the wrong thread.  You should keep the french in the Franch thread.  Anyways with practice you will certainly improve.  It was nice to meet you.Avec de l'effort Caroline tu reussiras a ameliorer votre francais.  Tu deverais mettre les replique francaise dans le Franch thread que tu a cree.  Je suis tres content de vous rencontrer.Marc

coldfeeter · 发表于 2006-9-26 15:49

To Marc: Thank you so much. But work is work, people generally can achieve something when they are under pressure J

coldfeeter · 发表于 2006-9-26 15:51

But definitely i am not a work stiff : )

coldfeeter · 发表于 2006-9-28 14:45

Hi, First Lady, Your Honor, i don't think i am scary but i might be a little bit talkative

hilary · 发表于 2006-9-27 22:39

hi girl, you scared me with so many words.:)i just dropped in and found the topic:that is life.we've been complaining these days for not having a good living place.it's awful,i know.and you know what's the worse? i just cannot get asleep because of this.it's silly,cause we can change nothing.many big problems are running to us,making us full of helplessness.sigh,so that is life.you may not like it,but you've got to face it.it needs courage,doesn't it?

coldfeeter · 发表于 2006-9-27 17:14

Luckily, once again I have finished the work 15 minutes earlier than usual, meaning that I have the following minutes to continue the topic. Much to my regret, I could not manage to come here every day as what I did in the early September because I am getting busier and busier with days going by. Well, I have been thinking about for a little while to gabble out a bit about my life from the day I began to work, which I thought is a good leap. Recollecting the past experiences can make me sensibly face the reality and cherish what I have already had.  I once was a jovial, ardent, naïve and elfin baby girl, looking everything around with curious eyes. Confidently, I put all my heart into study and began my work with pride. Life is full of possibilities but eventually I decided to do what I dreamt of even when I was toddler. I definitely chose the right job but by no means came to the right place. Just like what is in other people’s opinion, Tiantai is really a good place with beautiful mountain scenery but far from satisfying in some other aspects. It is a tiny plot without big department stores, nor has it any decent place to relax after work. There are one or two coffee houses, three or four discos, five or six karaoke bars and a few tea houses. I would be a regular customer of the coffee house if only it were of a high grade and well run. I would have to discos or karaoke bars many times if I had not been informed that I would be mistaken as a woman of easy virtue rather than a well-behaved lady if I were found in these places. There is nearly no applause-worthy way to have fun. Shopping might be a pleasure but at that time I was not used to shopping in this place. I might buy some paraphernalia. My job requires more adult-like people so I sometimes dared not buy some small articles in some funky places in fear of being considered childish. Besides, I did make the acquaintance of some people when I first came here, I just could not find a real friend or soul mate to confide, sharing happiness or sorrows. I myself might be too gauche. Life was boring and colorless. I worked all day and the only fun was to enjoy nothing.  On the other hand, I do like my job but I am not the kind of people with ambition. I undertake my job according to my conscience, finishing everything what I am supposed to, with no idea to contend with others. I have never thought I should strive to outdo others in the field I am concerned. So in this increasingly competitive world, I am forced to be compared by other people even though I don’t want to. Someone says the work of mine is like sailing against stream you either forge ahead or fall behind. Despite the fact that I actually went ahead in my own good time, I lagged behind other people because they moved with more speedy steps. Anyway, I had not got a sense of success in what I was doing. What is worse, though I got the hearsay that the man once I loved was going to marry some other girl when I was a senior in the university, I was still quite in low spirits at the beginning of the work. I just could not get why on earth he switched his attention around to another girl. We did not openly make a so-called oath that we would be with each other for ever as lovers in the novels but he did promise he would wait for me. How changeable he is. As a result of dissatisfaction at current life, frustration in work and disappointment in love, I became joyless, antisocial, nonchalant to anything in appearance but actually rather emotional at the bottom of my heart. I had hoped to grow apathetic about everything around me, secluding myself in my own world and standing aloof from every worldly strife, but it turned out I was not so willingly to live a sequestered life.  I once lived a dissipated life, hanging about the street with one or two foreigners, staying in the bar all night and thoroughly intoxicated, and then the next day still feeling dizzy from the hangover. I was a loser and a reprobate. Seldom had I touched alcohol though I could drink a little since I began to remember things because of the influence of my father. However, I started to drink a lot because of the miseries mentioned above, on the ridiculous grounds that drinking would help me forget pains and I could easily fall asleep when I was drunk. Sometimes I would not just get drunk but suffer form alcoholism, breaking out in a rash, tossing and turning in bed all night. I tried to drown my sorrows in alcohol only to sink in deeper sorrow. When the wine is in, the wit is out. Once in a while, I did forget myself in the cups, mumbling foolish things. Then one day I suddenly realized I should not move on like a loser. I had always known exactly where the shoe pinches and I was sure I could overcome all those difficulties. Therefore, I was totally transformed, becoming jolly again, but more assiduous, more natural and more equable after all these sufferings, just as a saying goes a fall in the pit but a gain in the wit : )  Now I can take a proper measure of more things as well as myself. Adhering to the golden mean, I aspire after no merit but merely wish to be free from errors. I still do not want to compete with others and I can feel easy with that. It never bothers me any longer how I am compared by others. I just want to be myself and do what I think is right. Having obtained the knowledge that life is not always ales and cakes, I can play it cool when in trouble and keep a relatively level head when confronting ruthless interpersonal relations. What makes me even happier is that there is another him always there for me for quite a long time. I used to think he was not my style and might be the second best whom I could not settle for. But after all these years, he is there, trying to make me happier and the like. I once fell for a guy but got hurt deeply. I do not want to be unhappy again. Looking back, I could tell how stupid I was but really could not picture what life would be like if I were still with the first him. We quarreled a little even when we were caring so much about each other. I don’t like his mother either so I could not imagine how I could get along with his mother since there is an unstated law in China that mothers always have problems with their daughters-in-law. Strangely, when I put down all these sentences he is everywhere in my mind and I find myself missing him a little bit. I did love him. Well, I have to get it over since he has been a married guy and I have had my own life. If nothing particular happened, I would love the second him, heart and soul, who is a nice guy and I should on no account hurt him. I believe in an Arabic legend, saying the second every girl is born, angels pick out a right man for her and no matter what happens later the true love between them will stay, and the man is always there waiting for the girl, who is his precious under any conditions. So he might be the guy angels have chosen for me and I might be his precious. ( I use the word ‘might’ for the reason that we recently seems to have difficulty understanding each other very well. ) I have sort of confidence that my life will have excellent prospects. No matter what will happen in future, I am sure I will be a judicious, artistic, noble and elegant lady, living blissfully in easy circumstances.

coldfeeter · 发表于 2006-9-27 16:44

come arcoss lots of BS these days

coldfeeter · 发表于 2006-9-29 10:24

I am considering going out for a walk during the national holiday, for it happens once in a blue moon that we could have such a long holiday.

coldfeeter · 发表于 2006-9-29 10:48

One of my friends are going to have a picnic on the National Day, but she refused to take me because they have set kinda rules that only male friends are permitted or whatever. So i have to think out some other ways to have fun. getting together with family is a good idea and sleeping away days is another choice. I am always in want of sleep. Sleeping all day long could be one of the best things happening ever.

hilary · 发表于 2006-9-29 10:56

haha,you bet,beauty.someday on this short vacation we shall get together for an outing.i'm deadly longing for that!

coldfeeter · 发表于 2006-9-29 10:56

Anyway, no rush deciding what to do right now since there is still two days to go:)